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Mirror Lore

What is that reflection I see when I check myself out in the mirror?

According to ancient legend, it is actually your own soul staring back at you. Now, maybe someone should tell your soul it has a little spinach in its teeth.

What happens if I drop a mirror?

You'd better be careful! If that mirror shatters, your soul will shatter too.

Why will I get seven years of bad luck if I break a mirror?

If you weren't so clumsy, you wouldn't have to worry about it! But since you asked, a lot of people mistakenly believe that your body replaces all of its cells every seven years. This means it will take seven years for your shattered soul to renew itself!

Seven whole years??? Can't anything be done about that? 

Probably not, but here are some things ancient people would try:

  • Try dunking your mirror in south-flowing waters for seven hours. If your arm doesn't get numb and you survive the seven hours, you will wash away all the bad luck.
  • Head to the nearest graveyard and tap the broken mirror pieces on a gravestone seven times. This should heal the soul and restore your luck. Now run, in case all that tapping woke someone up.
  • Grind all the reflective surfaces to a dust. Once the broken soul can no longer be reflected, you should be fine. Of course, you won't be able to see yourself, but let's face it, you didn't really care for your last haircut anyway.
  • Stuff all the pieces in a bag and bury it. Out of sight, out of mind. If you start to see a bunch of well-groomed gophers, though, you might be in trouble.
  • Absolutely DO NOT tap the gravestone AND bury the bag! Doing both is bad! Why? Who knows? Those ancient people weren't always the smartest.

Why can't vampires see their reflection? 

DUH! They have no souls.

What's the deal with Alice and her looking glass?

Mirrors are thought to be portals to other worlds and dimensions. These worlds are home to evil spirits who are just itching to poke their head into this world and cause trouble. When Alice steps into the mirror, she ends up in such a vile and evil place that they won't even let her share in their afternoon tea.

Why shouldn't you have mirrors in funeral homes?

It is said that the soul lingers around until the body is buried, so be careful not to say anything bad about the deceased's outfit. Unfortunately, while the soul is just hanging out minding its own business, it becomes very easy for it to get sucked inside the mirror and dragged away by some bigger, badder soul. Worse yet, some creep inside the mirror might manage to pop out looking to inhabit a fresh body.

What is the Mirror Test?

The Mirror Test is a way to separate the extremely bright from the not-so-extremely bright. Only animals with high intelligence can recognize themselves in a mirror. This puts us humans in the esteemed company of chimps, Asian elephants, gorillas, bottlenose dolphins, European magpies, orcas, and orangutans. The rest of them are still trying to figure out why that guy in the window "WON'T STOP COPYING ME!"

Can I see my future in the mirror?

Well, if you are a young, unmarried woman, and you concentrate as you look in the mirror by candlelight while brushing your hair and eating an apple, and you ask the question, "Who will be my future husband?," then yeah. Otherwise, you're on your own.

Do mirrors have any good qualities?

Apparently, both George Washington and mirrors cannot tell a lie. They are always truthful in what they show and say, so be careful if you ask the mirror if those pants make your butt look big.

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